"I am testing the.....

Linda Syverson Dent
Copyright 1997

Submitted by:
Robert L. Dent
Senior Trooper
Oregon State Police

I am testing the
limits of my pain
it is so big that when i
stretch out my
arms i can
barely touch the
edges of it.
there is only fractional space on
either side of it,
not even enough to
wrap my fingers around
if i could
reach that far.
it is so big that it
fills my horizon
....i cannot look any-
where without
seeing it.
it is all-present.
it goes to bed with me
at night and gets up
with me in the
morning. it follows me
around all day like a
faithful dog. there are
times when i don't know
what i would do without it
because when the faithful
dog is gone, who will be
there to take his place?
the pain is versatile.
it crawls inside of me and
curls up like a stone.
sometimes i try to carry it
but it is too heavy.
sometimes i try to pretend it
isn't there, but that
doesn't work because i
know better.
and sometimes i look
straight at it and a funny
thing happens. it gradually
begins to fade away until it
becomes transparent and i can
see straight through to
what's on the other side.